Keep your eyes on the Celestial City

Last night, as we were getting the kids ready for bed, Matt was watching "A Christmas Carol" on TV and Jonah was in his room finishing up "Little Pilgrim's Progress". The scene on TV was of Marley visiting Mr. Scrooge. I asked Matt why Marley was in chains. I know it had been explained before but I couldn't remember. "He's bound to the things he bound himself too in life. Whatever he deemed as most important and above all else and weighed him down in life are now his chains in death." Heavy stuff! After that I went in to see how Jonah was doing. He had to finish the book last night as it was due tomorrow. He read the final chapters to me and then said something that was just as heavy. "We have to keep our eye on the Celestial City and not focus on the troubles around us. Mom, that means we have to keep our eyes on heaven and not the problems we have right now." My heart was full at hearing my son say that. "Jonah, that's so true. Christ and his Kingdom are forever and they're all that really matters. The troubles of today are temporary but the Celestial City is forever and it's beautiful."

I've been struggling to be close to my Father for a while now. It's been a very hard few months. All of the things I had bound to myself as being something I could rely on or find some form of comfort in are being stripped away form me. I found out that I will no longer be able to keep the role I love and while I am working towards other roles, they're not a guarantee... Therefore, my future employment is not promised like I thought it once was. We get home and we're exhausted and the house is not being kept up.... Matt was sick for an entire week meaning we lost an entire weeks worth of pay (with Christmas right around the corner no less)... And, I'll be very honest, I'm REALLY struggling with accepting the outcome of the election. I never thought the results of any election would scare me as much as this one does. I have long felt our nation was a good one but not great... but now I've lost faith that it's even a good one. To see that the people I know and love have bound themselves to propaganda, fake news and fear to the point that we elected a thin-skinned man child to the highest office of the land has shaken me to the core. I say these things not to pick a fight but to bare my soul with the struggles I'm having. Every day I read news, hear news, see news of this person throwing a tantrum over stupid things, berating and attacking those who dare to publicly disagree with him and put CEO's and Wall Street Fat Cats in position of power and I tremble. I see hate crimes in my home country rising and fear and hate ruling the day. I know I have repeatedly asked God to prove to the nation that we aren't really a Christian nation but I never expected he would use Christians and those who claim to be Christians to do it.
All of these things have sunk me low and, even in this joyful season... This season of perpetual hope... The season where we are supposed to remember the greatest gift God has ever given... I have found myself broken and sorrowful. That's why last night hit me so hard. Over the last few months I have bound the troubles of the now to me as if they were all that actually existed or mattered. For years I have clung to the comforts of this life as being the things that bring real comfort. God has seen fit to pull the curtain off of the mirror and show me what I've done. Bit by bit he is taking away the things that have lulled me into a false sense of comfort and temporary happiness and has laid bare what I really need. I need HIM. I need to keep my eyes on HIM and his Kingdom! That is where true joy comes from. That is where true comfort and peace come from. They don't come from me having a cushy job. They don't come from my government. They don't come from a clean and well put together house. They come from Christ. God, forgive me for clinging to things that don't matter in the end. Help me to keep my eyes on the Celestial City and on you.